Bollywood Cricket: Head Injury

An opening batsman is hit on the head by a fierce bouncer, the first ball of the match. He is injured and taken to hospital. Meanwhile, the bowler has announced his retirement from all forms of cricket. In the commentator’s box, Sunil Gavaskar is joined by guest commentators from Bollywood, both directors of Bollywood films.

Gavaskar starts off the discussion on the incident: "That was poor judgement by the batsman. He went forward to a short ball, which means he misjudged the length. Also, he took his eye off the ball. Also, why should the bowler retire from cricket? That’s weird. It’s not his fault, unless he chucked. What do you think, Mr. Subhash Ghai?"

Subhash Ghai: "Actually Sunny, you have missed the point, completely. Can’t you see it is clearly a case of rebirth. The batsman was a bowler in his previous life. And the bowler was a batsman, in his. And in that previous life, the same incident we saw just now took place. And the batsman, in that previous life, was also hospitalized, and lost his life. Now, 80 years later, the reincarnations of the bowler and batsman have met again on a cricket field and their roles are reversed. The bowler has retired after just one ball in competitive cricket because the ‘karz’ has been paid."

Aditya Chopra: "No, Subhash. Actually, the batsman is a villain. He is about to get married to the bowler’s girlfrend, whom the bowler met in Switzerland. She was about to board a train — in which the villain was waiting for her — and she missed the train because of the bowler. And to cut a long story short, the girlfriend’s father who is a farmer in Punjab who owns many "sarson ke khet" has decided to marry her off to the villain. But the hero says "Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge". So now that the villain has been sent to hospital, the hero will elope with the heroine. That’s why he has retired from cricket, because he doesn’t want to lose time."

Meanwhile, Gavaskar has fainted.

Tags: Bollywood, Gavaskar

Category: Bollywood Cricket, Satire